I actually got this question on my Instagram when I asked you guys what you wanted to read more about and as soon as I read this question I knew it was one I had to talk about. I’ve actually kind of touched on this subject in some of my recent posts but not really gone too in depth about how to achieve mental health and happiness in a social media crazed world and having to deal with what society thinks is the “norm.”
For anyone who thinks I have no clue what this topic means because I’m a blogger well you are surely mistaken. If anything I’ve suffered from unhappiness from social media all too often because well,.. I have to stare at it all day everyday for my job. With that being said, I’ve figured out how to NOT let these “norms” get to me and so I thought I’d share with all of you!
HAVE SOME PERSPECTIVE. Social media is a place where everyone presents only what they WANT you to see. Don’t give into Instagram & Facebook envy. Remind yourself often and always that NO ONE has a perfect life no matter what their photos appear to portray.
APPEARANCE IS NOT ALL YOU THINK. Somehow we have all become masters at making ourselves look absolutely nothing like ourselves. I literally know bloggers who go through about 10 different apps before their photo is “instagrammable.” Trust me, I’ve done it. It’s so easy these days to make yourself tanner, skinnier, get rid of pimples, wrinkles, bruises,… you get the point. I remember a long time ago when I started doing my first face to face meetings with brands one in particular said, “Wow Olia, you actually look just like your photos!” I was SO confused in my head thinking, why in the world wouldn’t I look like my photos??? Then, I started to figure it out. People are literally erasing all of their blemishes and making themselves look virtually perfect but the problem is it’s not you. So never compare yourself to someone else on social media in terms of appearance. We are all human beings. We are all meant to look unique and beautiful in our own ways.
RELATIONSHIPS ARE NOT PERFECT. Who am I to talk, I’ve been single for about 3 years but I think I know a thing or two I can shed light on. No one in their right mind is going to Instagram a photo of the horrid brawl that erupted with their significant other. No one is “Man Crush Mondaying” their boyfriend who they just found out cheated on them. We all get on social media and think damn every other couple on here has these amazing relationships filled with dozens of roses on the daily. Come on now, do you know how much roses cost?? I think not…
TRAVELING IS NOT ALWAYS GLAMOROUS. Don’t get me wrong, traveling is so amazing and I’m often incredibly jealous when I scroll through photos of people on trips I am not getting invited on or just couldn’t afford altogether. But remember, we only show the photos that make perfection APPEAR to be reality and then wonder why our trips are always disasters, right? Common, I’ve forgotten my passport before, worn incredibly uncomfortable shoes to the point where I wanted to cry walking through the airport, gotten sick on vacation and SO much more. While I could choose to post the photo of me laying in bed with tissues stuffed up my nose OR I could post that photo of me on a remote beach while the sun sets in the distance. Hmm.. I think I know which one I’d post, don’t you?
FOOD IS FOOD. Food is not supposed to be pretty. You literally look at it for 10 seconds and then stuff it in your mouth. And lets be honest, if your food really does look that good in person, you’re spending about 15-20 minutes trying to arrange the table to look good and filter the heck out of it to make it look “instagrammable.”
WE DON’T ALL LIVE IN DESIGNER CLOTHING. I’m a fashion blogger and I’ll be the first to tell you no one is breaking out their fat pants for a selfie. We are going to be wearing our trendiest/newest clothing and showing off the ONE photo out of about 50 that we took beforehand. Seriously though — do you guys have any idea how many shots it takes to get ONE good one?! It’s actually kind of depressing! From this angle you look fat, from that angle you look short.. it happens to the best of us. I’m pretty sure I’d lose my title as a fashion blogger if you guys saw what I actually wake up looking like.
Moral of the story? We are all professionals at making reality look like an elaborate photo story of perfection but I hate to break it to you guys, it isn’t real. To achieve mental health and happiness it is so important to remember that simple fact. Never be guilty of what someone else portrays or has because we don’t know what is behind that story and how many filters it took to get there 😉 Life is messy and stressful and sad at times. We get into stupid fights, spill coffee all over our clothes and drink way too much ending with a sloppy Saturday night. That’s the way it is supposed to be – we are human, imperfect and not anything like the people we pretend to be online and you know what? Thank God for that.
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